Thursday, May 03, 2007

Analysis is a Dish Best Served Cold

Dear Anne and Mike,
I find that I often do my best thinking on Cold Nights. Something about walking on a cold night gives me the most focused approach and constructive thoughts (this could in no small part be due to the fact that I envision my brain overheating like an engine or boiling when I think too much and that manifests itself in an actual sense of warmth. So the cold counteracts. Call it the nuclear reactor effect). We're coming to the end of our cold nights though, and the change is welcome. One specific cold night back in Williamstown, it occurred to me that I've felt exact same emotional states before. Now, that's sounds incredibly obvious, but what I mean to point out is that when we are in an emotional 'zone' for a period of time, we often don't remember this feeling from it's last incarnation. Either because the circumstances or the specifics of this time are different from that other time. If you follow. The specifics will blur the lines and make you forget you've been there before, you've done that before, and only the environment is a tad different. And it isn't until you snap out of it that you can see this. The immense similarities. The overwhelming and eternal 'duh' that overcomes you is pretty surprising. It's a little humbling too, but it's also refreshing as it reminds you of how well you know yourself and how silly our 'selves' can be at times.

For me though, I'm at a crossroads where of late I've found it hard to stick to any one conclusion about where to direct my life or what are my 'issues' that I need to tackle. And one of the reasons is because we live in a world that offers much stimulation. I think one of the keys to sanity is not to not question, but to limit the hyper-stimulating factors, as well as the anxiety driving toxins, so that the analysis is more constructive. Simplifying my life to include as many of the passive enjoyments as possible (those we don't have to think about, but just enjoy almost as instinct) is another key. Those things make the tough complex thinking easier to handle. And in my mind more productive. They are the yin and tough decisions/questions are the yang. That's just my two cents for the moment. A great math teacher I had back in junior high named Mr. Beloin used to say "Keep it Simple Stupid!" So true Mr. Beloin. Whenever possible, I try to keep things simple.
The thinkin that is.

Chicken wings are my yin to the question of where is my life going.

Nite folks,


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